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Dear Abby: Don’t overreact when 2 sons not invited to family wedding – MLive.com

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DEAR ABBY: I have one sister I love. Our parents passed away 12 years ago. We don’t have a good relationship, although I try. Recently, we have been texting again. Her son is being married in a few months. I have three children. My 26-year-old has been in trouble a lot and caused my sister’s family hurt. He’s not going to the wedding. My other boys are younger, 18 and 21. They have never been in trouble.

I have maintained somewhat of a relationship with my nephew. He has only three cousins on his mom’s side. There are at least 17 cousins on his dad’s side. Many of them have spouses, and they are all invited. My younger sons are not. Because I am deeply hurt, I have decided not to attend. My nephew’s excuse for not inviting my sons was that “attendance is tight.”

Am I wrong for not going? I can’t help but think my sister and (all but one) of her kids don’t want a relationship with my family. Should I let it go or continue pursuing a relationship when it seems obvious the feeling is not reciprocated? — DEEPLY HURT IN TEXAS

DEAR DEEPLY HURT: It’s a shame that your two law-abiding sons are being tarred with the same brush as the one who is a black sheep. They do not deserve it. However, I caution you against overreacting by boycotting the wedding. If you attend, it will give you an opportunity to tighten family ties and to talk about how proud you are of your two younger sons, who are on the straight and narrow.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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